How to Approach a Guy or Girl After Church Service?

Approaching someone you like in church can be tricky.

There are some signs that can help you to figure out if the guy or girl you want to approach likes you.

However, even if you know that they like you, it is important to be careful when trying to flirt with someone in the church.

Of all the places to meet someone new, the Church is where you have to follow many unwritten rules or etiquette.

If you unknowingly break any of the “unwritten rules,” you might lose any chance you had at even meeting that cute guy or girl or worse make a bad impression.

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Unwritten Rules of Meeting Men or Women in Church

1. The Church is Not a Bar or a “Pick-Up Place”

The church is a place of worship.

That is the main purpose of each person that goes there.

Therefore, this indicates that the place and everyone in it should be treated with the utmost respect.

The church holds services or masses where people congregate together to listen to the sermon.

They are there to commune with other believers.

If even just one person gets the impression that you are simply there to “pick up” men or women, it will be an immediate turnoff.

This is not to disregard basic human emotions.

Of course, there will be people who attend church hoping to meet someone of the same faith.

The main difference should be the way you go about your intentions.

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2. Modesty & Discretion is the Practice

Unlike other places, the church is where people practice modesty & discretion.

You can dress nicely but appropriately.

Anything too revealing may offend some people.

For women, overdoing your makeup may send out the wrong message.

For men, being overly casual with your ripped jeans or tank tops does the same.

Your behavior, manners, and appearance should be appropriate.

3. In the Church, Other People’s Opinions Matter

The way you live your life shouldn’t be driven by what other people say about you. Except for this case.

You have to realize that people in the church live by a standard that is more or less followed by everyone.

The opinions of the elderly and advisors or mentors are also highly regarded.

This means that the way other people perceive you will more or less affect how the person you like would also see you.

The stark difference between trying to meet someone in church and other places is the intention.

Most people in the church are looking for serious committed relationships, which will eventually lead to marriage and raising a family together.

Before you even begin to think about approaching anyone in the church, you have to set your intentions as clear as possible in your mind.

Are you just looking for friendship or are you looking for a committed relationship?

It is also important to remember that there are different expectations for men and women when it comes to romantic relationships.

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Christian Dating: Men Vs. Women

Women are expected to be more tactful when it comes to approaching men they’re interested in.

They are often to be pursued and not the ones doing the pursuit.

Women in the church aren’t as forward and are seen to be more reserved.

They usually send subtle hints to their person of interest.

Men are given more freedom to be open with women regarding their interests.

Since men are the “pursuers,” it’s more acceptable that they profess their feelings to someone they like.

Regardless of the expectations for men and women, both still face similar struggles when it comes to approaching people they like in church.

If both are overly shy, then nothing will happen.

They lose their chance of getting to know the other person just because both of them were simply “waiting” for the other to make a move.

How to Meet a Christian Guy or Girl From Church?

1. Church Designed Activities

Believe it or not, there are actual church-designed activities to help single people get to know one another and potentially start something from there.

Use this to your advantage, especially if you’re the shy type.

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2. Bible Studies to Meet Singles in Church

Being a person of faith who goes to church, this should be an activity you’re already regularly going to.

You may not have been seeing this as a place you can approach someone you’ve never talked to before.

Of course, you shouldn’t just go to your Bible study to “hit” on someone.

Going about it appropriately will allow you to strike up that first conversation with someone naturally by talking and discussing the topic at hand.

3. Church Retreats

Most churches conduct annual retreats for Young Professionals.

This usually lasts three to four days. During this time, you spend a few days studying the teachings of the Bible and worshipping.

There are also fun activities designed by the organizers to get people to socialize.

You are often formed into teams where you have to work together.

And if you happen to just be on the same team as someone you’ve been eyeing for a long time, you can easily approach him or her.

4. Ministry

Being involved in a church is also a great way to meet a lot of people.

Finding out what your talents are and how you can volunteer your time in a church will allow you to spend time with other people who are doing the same.

Compared to other people who only go to church on Sundays, being in a ministry allows you to have more chances at approaching that guy or girl you like at a more appropriate time.

Now, we can assume that you, the reader, are also a person of faith who goes to church since you’re reading this article.

If you are not, you should reconsider what your true motives are in pursuing someone who is going to church.

Realizing that deciding to approach a guy or girl at church will make you responsible for the other person as well.

When you attempt to begin a relationship with anyone at church, it is expected that you relay your intentions clearly.

You have to guard your heart and theirs.

Beginning with friendships is the best way to get to know someone at your local church and eventually build something more from that.

Being willing to wait, prayerful, and considerate will help you establish the right foundation with anyone you like at church.

Should You Try Meeting Christian Single Online?

As we discussed, the main challenge with meeting single guys or girls in the church is the potential for negative public judgment if you are too direct with your approach.

Another challenge is that not every single Christian guy or girl goes to your church.

If you only focus on meeting people in your church, you might miss a lot of other Christian singles that go to different churches.

Finally, if your church is small, you might be very limited on who you can approach.

That’s why it might be worth joining a Christian dating site.

This way you don’t have to worry about approaching anyone in the church.

Read next: 11 Guys to Avoid When Dating Online (Plus How to Spot a Good Man)