Many times when people see a younger woman and an older man in a relationship, the phrase “gold digger” pops to mind. Other people consider the prevalence of the arrangement sexist; viewing the women as “trophy wives” or objectified prizes of some sort.
However, while these arrangements do happen, there are actually a variety of reasons why women date older men.
Advantages of Dating Older Men
When you look past the money, often times younger women date older men because they are more mature than their peers are. This is especially the case with young women but can happen with older women as well.
At some point, most women get tired of the college-style hookup culture or the loud bar scene. They want a slightly quieter relationship with some real substance to it, something that is more than just fun. An older man is the one that they will turn to for this, as he is generally more mature.
While younger men tend to be focused on the present and have a habit of living recklessly, older men have already started on the path they actually want their life to take. A woman can have a confident conversation about future plans with an older man, and it will be a two-way street. While a younger man may have vague dreams of being a DJ, an older man will likely have a more concrete career plan.
Older men will also have more respect and interest in his partner. An older man is much less likely to date a woman exclusively because of her looks or to show her off to his friends. As mentioned earlier, he may have his eye more on the future, not just in his career but also in his relationships. This is not true of all older guys, but some will be looking for a meaningful relationship, even if it doesn’t end in marriage, rather than a one night stand or a bit of fun. If the woman is mature for her age and is looking for something more than a hookup, an older man may be the way to go.
Dating older men is not limited to women in their twenties and thirties though. If a woman is getting back on the market after a divorce or the loss of a spouse, older men may come into play once more. If a woman’s marriage ends but she already has children, she may want to marry again but not expand her family.
Especially if the woman is still fairly young, the men in her age group may still be looking to have children and start their own family. An older man is less likely to want this. He, too, may have already had a family and done that section of his life, and is now just looking for companionship.
Older Men are More Experienced
Older men will inevitably have more experience in bed and in serious relationships. Many women turn to older men for better sex when they find men their own age disappointing. When you’re not dealing with a one-night stand, both parties care more about the other. Often with young men, the sex is all about them, rather than the woman. With an older man, he has more experience and will have some tricks up his sleeve. In addition, if a woman is in a relationship with an older man, he’s not just looking for another notch on his bedpost.
Experience is not just a bonus in bed; it is also a useful tool for a lasting relationship. An older man will have had other relationships, and made his share of mistakes, which he learns from. By the time he gets to a younger woman, he will have picked up some warning signs to watch out for, and he’ll be more communicative.
More Reasons for Dating Older Men
Let’s face it; most people don’t want to date themselves. The old saying of a “double-edged sword” rings true when it comes to dating. If a woman and a man are in the same age group, they are more likely to run into this issue. They’ve been raised on the same music and movies, grew up surrounded by similar ideology, and have taken similar paths so far in order for them to intersect.
An older man, in contrast, will have exciting stories from his expanded experience. He may have different bands and TV shows to share with a younger partner, and perhaps a little more chivalry to boot. The woman is important in the relationship too; she can introduce him to some of her interests that he may not have tried before, or take him out for the occasional night of fun with a younger crowd. This give and take is important and keeps the relationship interesting as you get to know each other.
There are many reasons why younger women go for older men. Money is definitely one of them, but not just because he can pay for dates. An older man will also be more financially experienced and careful than a younger guy. He will respect a woman’s budget rather than convincing her to participate in activities she can’t afford.
Older men are more likely to have the qualities above, but they are not guaranteed to. It is still important to choose a partner who is compatible for you. Even if you do find a man with maturity and experience, be sure that you are ready for that level of commitment as well. If you are looking to meet younger women join Match.com here: View pics for free now on Match.com, the #1 dating site!