There are a lot of concerns that people have in regards to meeting someone from Tinder in person for the first time. You may be worried that they are not the same person in real life that they presented themselves as on the app. Maybe they are but there’s more to them that throws up a red flag or two when you are face to face. What if the connection you had over the app just isn’t there offline?
A lot of these concerns are valid and can impact how you handle that first meeting. To ease those fears—and stay safe!—here’s what you can do when meeting someone from Tinder in person.
Pick Something Simple for Your Tinder Date
Meeting someone for the first time does not require rolling out the red carpet to impress them. You don’t even have to have the first meeting be considered an actual date! Go with something simple, like coffee at Starbucks or a local shop. This can help dispel some first meeting jitters that both of you may have and also you to properly gauge if this is someone you want to spend more time with in the real world. It also puts less pressure on the both of you to absolutely wow the other. Successful first impressions can be tricky to pull off when the another person has really high expectations. Picking something simple for your first meeting will allow you to raise the bar in future meetings and dates.
Check Them Out Elsewhere
The concept of “catfishing”, where people use fake profiles to lure or scam others, unfortunately, is common on Tinder and other dating apps. Before you agree to meet, go check the person out on their other social media accounts. Most Tinder users will link their Instagram, Twitter, and/or Facebook accounts to their profile to help make it easier to interact and woo potential matches. It also adds a layer of credibility. If the person has limited information on their Tinder profile—no bio or one that’s weak, no linked accounts, and maybe only one or two photos—it may be a sign that the account isn’t legit and possibly should be avoided.
Meet In Public
It’s easier and safer to meet with someone in public than it is in a private or secluded setting. This can help if you are familiar with the location, which can make you feel more comfortable and help with any nervousness. A public space with other people nearby can also be helpful if something goes wrong during the meeting and you feel unsafe. You should also keep the first meeting in that public space—do not go home with them or to an unknown location to keep things going. Try meeting in the daytime, too; it’s more likely that there will be plenty of people and it can also help keep things casual. It’s okay to turn them down if they are trying to get you to meet them somewhere you are unfamiliar with or don’t feel safe at. When that happens, either try to convince them to try somewhere else or end things and move on.
Let Someone Know About Your Tinder Date
The outcome of the first meeting with a Tinder date can be hard to predict. If you’re nervous or worry about the first meeting, then let someone close to you—a friend, roommate, sibling—know where you’re going if you need help getting out of a sketchy situation. It can also help if someone needs to reach you during the meeting. Even if you’re feeling great about the meeting, it’s still a good idea to let someone know in case something happens. Asking a friend to tag along and be in the general vicinity—at another table in the coffee shop, for example—can also help. They can not only act as a safety net, but they can also give you feedback and their own opinion about the person you’re meeting. Your date could do something while you weren’t looking that might throw up a red flag and your friend could potentially catch it for you.
It’s Okay If Things Don’t Work Out with Your Tinder Date
So maybe you just don’t click with the person when you meet. Maybe they say or do something that grosses or weirds you out. When that happens, you don’t have to stick with them and try to make it work. Simply go on the app and unmatch them. Wait until after the first meeting to swap contact information like phone numbers to avoid any unwanted messages from someone who you’re not okay with. If during the meeting, something happens that makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, then speak up! Be honest and tell them that you’re not okay with something they’ve said to you or did. End the meeting if it continues, or they refuse to stop or apologize. It’s okay to walk away and they should respect that.
Also, you should keep in mind that Tinder mostly caters to people looking for casual relationships. If you are looking for something more serious you might not have much luck on Tinder. Instead, try joining more serious dating website such as Eharmony – Registration