Dating as a single mom can be daunting. How will you balance your love life while putting just as much if not more focus on your child? Not only that but where do you even find men who would be open to dating someone with children?
The questions of a single mother on the dating scene can be endless, but there is hope. Below are ways single mothers can try getting back into the dating scene.
Know when the time is right
Did YOU know?
1) Only 9 percent of women and 2 percent of men found a relationship at a bar or club
2) 38% of singles are using online dating
3) One in six marriages now begin online
A common mistake when single mothers choose to start dating again is rushing into it. It may be tempting to want to find a second parental figure for your child ASAP, but it can do more harm than good. You want to make sure you are mentally prepared before trying your luck with someone. Consider all of the factors that you may face before dating again.
Will the person you have in mind be a great fit for your children or child? If so, will they understand that at certain times you may have to cancel plans to tend to your child or even bring them along? Finding an understanding partner is one of the many keys to having a successful relationship as a single mother.
Dating and time management
As a mother, you may find that you are always on the go. From school to appointments, some quiet downtime seems to be a rarity. If you seem to always be on the go you can try a hand at online dating. Usually, when creating a profile the website or app requires you to write a description of yourself. Under the description make it known that you are a single mother looking for a relationship. Mentioning your parental status will ensure that those who are interested in dating know full well what is included.
Where to meet potential partners?
Since you don’t have much time to go out and meet people, you may want to consider trying online dating instead. Not only this will save you the time but you also will be able to filter out men who are not interested in dating someone with children. Most of the good dating websites will charge some kind of fee but the amount you pay will almost always worth the amount of time you spent by trying to meet someone offline. Find Singles Near You for FREE
Your date should not serve as a replacement
A common misconception amongst the community of single mothers who are choosing to date again is that finding a replacement for their former spouse is set as a goal. Before dating you must know that everyone is different. Do not go into the dating scene expecting your date to do something your former spouse used to. There may also a chance that your date may be inexperienced with children possibly unlike your former spouse, but is more than willing to learn from you. Do not push your date away if they mention that they have little experience with children. If they express that they would like nothing to do with a child that serves as a red flag. Move on and find someone else. Every date will not be the same.
Don’t focus too much on a romantic future
Unfortunately, dating is nothing like a fairy tale. Falling in love with someone you have just met is rare. When you learn about the person they are on the inside, that is when the love starts to blossom. Dating is not just about romance. In fact, most relationships stem from friendships. It is best to start out as friends to get an insight on your date’s interests.
Your date may confess many things to you on a friendly basis. Do not be dissuaded if your date states that they would like to be friends with you and possibly take you out more in the future. Making friends could possibly stem you out to mutual friends who might be interested.
Breaking the news to your child
So, you have nailed the date and everything between the both of you seems to be going great. Adults handle change differently than children. Before bringing your new spouse or date around your children explain to them what is going on. Be wary, for every child is different. They are bound to express their true feelings to you and listening to their point of view is key. Do not try to force this upon your child. Let them grow accustomed to the idea of having someone other than them around you.
Try introducing your date to your children as a friend and see how they interact with each other. If you notice that they are beginning to bond take note of that. If your date makes your kids happy and comfortable he or she is bound to make you feel the same way.
Do not let past relationships hinder you
You may have had a few rocky relationships in the past, but you owe it to yourself to keep pushing forward and live your life. Of course, mommy duty comes first, but your own happiness should be pursued. So go out and enjoy your time on the dating scene. You never know what opportunities await. Reason Men Won’t Commit To You