How to Approach a Girl or Guy at Church? (Without Getting Embarrassed)


If you ever tried to approach a guy or a girl in a church, you know that it is not that easy. Getting rejected in front of all other churchgoers is not fun! So what can you do if you see a gorgeous girl or handsome guy whom you want to approach and get to know better? There are a few simple steps that will guarantee you success and will save you from any potential embarrassment. 

Find the Right Time

There is a time and place to approach someone at church; this is important to know because it can be the difference between him or her taking you seriously—it would also be a negative comment on your character. You do not want to talk to them during a service, as that would be disrespectful to them and God, which will definitely not be in your favor.

There is a time before and after the service which would be appropriate to seek someone out. By doing so, you will be showing your good nature and values. If you are at a social event sponsored by your church, you will have many times to speak with the person of interest. Take advantage of the right opportunities and be patient.

Prepare What You Want to Say

This is something you want to do before you even approach him or her. You are not just stating a cheesy dialogue as others would use at a bar. No, a church has much more different standards that you should uphold in both your and their eyes. Therefore, it is important to plan out what you want to say before you go about it.

That being said, you do not want to plan a big speech to say to him or her. Most of the time you will forget half of what you had prepared. Have a general idea about what you want to say and where you would like to take them beforehand. That way, you won’t stumble when they time comes to approach him or her.

How to Approach Him or Her

You have prepared for the right moment and now it has come along. How do you go about approaching the person of interest? You don’t want to lack confidence, but at the same time, you don’t want to be overly-confident to the point you come off as cocky. Let’s discuss the mannerisms in which to approach the guy or girl at church.

First of all, before you approach him or her, you will want to make direct eye contact. This will let them know that your focus is on them with the intent of heading their way. Lack of eye contact or a constant connect and disconnect will seem like you are uncertain about you approaching them, or are simply just acknowledging their presence and nothing more. So when the time is right, start with direct eye contact.

Once that has been established, you can walk up to them. Now, do not just state that you like them or want to take them out. They don’t know you and will become extremely intimidated or freak out. Shake their hand, introduce yourself, and start with some small talk.

You will want to get to know him or her a little more before you begin speaking what you’ve prepared. Once the small talk has been established it is time to finally fulfill your mission. Now for some of you, you can have different intentions for approaching your person of interest, so your moment will consist of two different responses:

  • You just wanted them to notice you: This won’t be the moment you ask them out or move things further with them. This is just the first step in getting him or her to become interested in you.
  • You will be trying to ask them out: This is the moment you will ask him or her out. My recommendation would be a church social event or activity; that way if they are hesitant about your intentions the activities by the church will have familiar faces, making it less uncomfortable and in a safe environment.

Remember to carry your best mannerisms before, during, and after you have approached him or her. You want to show them you are genuinely interested. Because you are approaching them at church, they expect a certain etiquette from you. Therefore, be on your best behavior to turn the odds in your favor.

It can often be daunting to approach a man or woman in the church. It is important that you are well-prepped when approaching him or her at the right time. You do not want to come off as disrespectful, especially in the house of God. Have faith and confidence and it will all work out as it is meant to.

If you are serious about finding a girl or a guy who goes to church you might want to consider giving a try to online dating. If you join the right website, you will be able to filter all the religious singles. This way you can get to know dozens of singles and be able to choose the one who you think might be your soulmate. Christian Dating – Meet Christian Singles Online at eHarmony

Did YOU know?

1) Only 9 percent of women and 2 percent of men found a relationship at a bar or club

2) 38% of singles are using online dating

3) One in six marriages now begin online